ReView: Uncultured by Daniella Mestyanek Young

 

Great memoirs have the power to show us that even though we have different experiences, there is universality; they can, whether implicitly or explicitly, highlight both the ways in which we are different and the ways in which we share experiences. One of the things that ties us together is our connection to each other, to groups and to culture. We’re all a product of the groups (and culture) that we surround ourselves with (whether we have a choice in the matter or not). Uncultured by Danielle Mestyanak Young not only serves as an honest, raw and alive portrait of one woman’s life lived; it allows us to see that we aren’t alone. Through her storytelling, she always finds a way to tie what seems like an incredibly unique experience back to ideas and systems we can all connect and relate to, and recognize in ourselves. Separated into three portions (three of the most impactful periods of her life), Daniella chronicles her life growing up in the Children of God cult, her time after escaping and integrating back into the Systemite (real) world as well as her time in the military. As we all know, we are products of our past and our experiences and Daniella has incredible intuitiveness about her that recognizes the connections between the many formative things that have happened to her and her situation at any given time. Her insight into herself and her environment is absolutely enlightening, and follows a progression that rings true. As you can imagine, this one can be tough to read with incidents of sexual violence (including against children) and mental illness. But every single thing is included for a reason here, highlighting how much these issues can impact our lives for a long time. To shy away from these incidences would not give a full picture of Daniella's life; reading of these incidences is painful but as the book progresses, we realize how crucial they become in shaping her future and the way she processes what happens to her. I have read a few books which do highlight the cult experience, but there is always something that feels separate about it. Something to the effect of, I wasn't there, so I can't possibly relate in any way. But with her truthful, honest candor and her ability to look back at her life through a lens of how it is all connected, Daniella helps us see that for ourselves. While we haven't shared some of the specific experiences she had, we can see that we're not alone and that there are indeed recurring themes throughout all of our lives (like the effects of groups and culture), they may just look a little different but that also make us quite similar.